


Entries From the Sea

by Merlin_Wolfgang_Trades_Hale



Series: SEAL Grunkle Stan [3]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Brotherly Angst, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Diary/Journal, Feelings, Fiddleford helps Ford figure out what feelings are, Fiddleford is a good pal, Ford getting to know Stan through his own journal, Ford has a lot of feelings, I'm Bad At Tagging, Jealous Ford Pines, Nostalgia, Rating has changed, SEAL Stanley Pines, Sea Monsters, Stan Pines Goes Through The Portal, Stangst, Stanley Pines is a Navy SEAL, Violence in the last chapter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2018-10-06
Packaged: 2019-07-27 06:17:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16213202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merlin_Wolfgang_Trades_Hale/pseuds/Merlin_Wolfgang_Trades_Hale
Summary: Three months after Joe White visits Ford in place of Stanley and tells him his brother is now a SEAL, Ford receives a package in the mail.It looks like a simple comprehension notebook used as a diary. On the surface, that's what it is. But on the inside...it's the life that could have been. For in it are the tales of his brother at sea, and all of the adventures, myths, and creatures that awaited him.





	1. Journal's Arrival

_"Dear Ford,_

_I got your package. I gotta be honest and admit I hadn't expected that. But then again it's been a while.  
We just don't know each other like we used to._

_I'll do my best to honor your wishes as best as I can. Don't worry about me, I'm great!_

_But do me a favor and if you talk to mom, don't tell her. She doesn't know._

_-Love,_

_Lee."_

 Ford read that letter over and over for the better part of an hour. To be honest with himself, he expected more. At least a full page. Before he would have thought it was because writing wasn't Stanley's strong suit, but now it was different. Stanley was a military man and had to keep things short and to the point. Ford was trying to read between the lines to see if there was something else his brother might be trying to say. 

But there was no secret message. 

The message was actually there in plain sight. 'We just don't know each other like we used to'. And Stanley was right. They didn't. It's been over a decade and Ford's guilt rises as he realizes how little he'd done to reach out to his family. His initial thoughts tell him that he wasn't very close with them, so it shouldn't matter. But it's a lie. 

He wasn't close to their father. Filbrick Pines was only interested in making a fortune and getting out of the dump that had been their home. Ford couldn't say he cared much for the man as he got older, but he couldn't say that about his mother. 

His mother who apparently wasn't aware that Stan had enlisted. Sure, he hadn't known either and it was more than unsettling that if it wasn't for the danger of Bill he might never have known himself. He has to sit down and let it all sink in. 

Stanley enlisted. 

His twin brother went and survived training and became a SEAL. He was out there in the world, on a ship, keeping their country safe. 

That was honestly more honorable than what he thought Stanley would end up doing. Not that he thought of his brother a lot in the last decade. He spent most of his time focusing on his achievements and making up for lost time because of Stanley's mistake. He held resentment and that was the last thing he remembered thinking about his brother. The person who cost him his future. 

Thinking about Stan now, and what he would have been if left alone...there wasn't much honor in his visions. Stanley was a mix of their mother and father. The anger and muscle of their father, and the con-artist but kind heart of their mother. His assumption of what his brother would end up doing reflected a lot on their parents. Running some sort of crappy shop in the middle of nowhere. 

But it seemed like Stanley kept his dreams alive. Even if they didn't include Ford. 

The amount of hurt he felt at that thought was illogical. Ford knew how stupid that dream was once they reached puberty. It held little merit and no real future! Not for him anyway. But it was real to Stanley. 

With Ford out of the way and nothing else to stop him...or help him, Stan had to be creative. The Navy hadn't even registered as a solution, despite how obvious it was. 

It had once been _their_ dream.  Along the way, Ford woke up and began to visualize his future. Was Stanley still asleep and still deep in his delusions? 

Those were troubling thoughts considering the dangers of being out at sea in his circumstances. Ford was possibly across the world and even if he wanted to, he couldn't help Stanley if he got into trouble. 

Why? Why was he suddenly feeling all of these emotions after not having them for a decade? Stanley was fine! He wouldn't be allowed to be a SEAL if he didn't know what he was doing, right? But then again, Stanley was one of the best liars Ford knew.

With a frustrated sigh, Ford forced himself to get back to his work. It only worked to distract him for a short while, afterward he sat at his desk and wrote another letter. 

 

_"Dear Stanley,_

_Why haven't you told mom? She'd be worried, sure, but also proud._

_I know I am, as I mentioned in my previous letter. But I am also concerned. You're being careful, right?_

_The journal you have is dangerous and can't fall into the wrong hands. Tell me you've hidden it well._

_Let me know in your next letter where you're stationed. Maybe I can fly out there._

_-Love,_

_Ford."_

* * *

 

It would be another three months before Ford heard from Stanley again. In that time he's recruited the help of Fiddleford and worked together on the portal and securing it. It had a lot of work involved but not without frustrating breaks where they reached a dead end of some sort. 

In those breaks, he could only think about Stanley and his journal. He wondered if they were both safe. If one had caused the other harm in some way. When he confided his fears with Fiddleford he got a lecture for seeming to place equal value on both his brother and the journal. The journal held important thoughts and ideas, but they could be re-written and rediscovered. Stanley was a human being, Ford's _twin_ , and a SEAL out doing God knows what sort of op!

Fiddleford knew that he wasn't cut out to be a soldier, but he has made payments on his home and student loans by selling patents to the military. He understands the sense of duty and loyalty of the military a bit more than Ford does. 

They would bicker for a bit before Fiddleford got to the core of Ford's fear. The man had let a stupid mistake become anger and let it fester inside of him for over a decade. Even though he still made some of his dreams come true, the resentment he held on to that in a sense helped him push harder, seemed a bit childish. Especially more so as he realized that the person he once knew better than himself, who shared his face, was now a stranger. One he couldn't predict. One who he couldn't reach out to or even call. 

Then the mail arrived. 

It wasn't a letter. 

It wasn't a nicely decorated or elegant journal either. 

It was a run of the mill comprehension notebook used to take notes in school. 

On the front in Stanley's handwriting was,  _"Stanely Pines: Sea Entries"_

"What is that?" Fiddleford asked. Then he picked up a note that fell from the envelope the notebook came in. "Don't worry Sixer, your journal is safe. Even my Commander will have trouble getting to it, and that crafty sonnuva bee is hecka crafty." Fiddleford frowned and Ford knew that he had been censoring Stanley's actual choice of words. "I woulda wrote sooner but I figured you'd appreciate this more. It ain't as scientific as you'd make it, but here are some of my weird findings out at sea."

Ford's head snapped up and then opened the journal and skimmed through it.

"What's he mean?" Fiddleford asked. 

"They're...journal entries. Sea monsters mostly I think. Stan...Stan wrote a journal for me."

"Well ain't that nice." Fiddleford smiled, but then frowned as he saw the look on Ford's face. "It is, ain't it?"

"Yeah...yeah..." Ford answered. It was nice. He should be excited to read what his brother has found, and he was. But there's a part of him that doesn't feel that excitement. And that weird feeling of resentment is back, but he can't place why. Was it resentment? Was it competitive worry? That Stan would find something grander out there than he's ever been able to find in Gravity Falls? 

He was beginning to chide himself for being so stupid when he froze. If he could get into as much trouble with Bill here, what sort of trouble can Stanley find out there?

He opens the journal and begins to read. 

 


	2. Hippocampi

~~"Dear Ford,~~

_'Journal entry number one._

_Even though these are my private thoughts, I won't disclose the whereabouts._

_I can understand that this will piss off my brother, Ford, who I intend to send this too, but it can't be helped._

_Part of it is a habit. Another part is that it's an order. I'll have to skip anything about my day job, even if I am being creative in sending this out later.'_

 

Ford paused as he frowned at that. Part of him was irritated that Stanley was leaving out such an important piece of information such as _location_! Another part of him was just worried. As time passed and Ford has reevaluated everything in his life, from his own life choices to the people he has around, or lack thereof, it all goes back to Stanley in the end.

In Ford's mind, Stanley always needed him. Stan was impulsive and a trouble-magnet. Always has been and always will be. Sure when he was young he was the same way. But he grew up. 

Stan grew up too. He just wasn't there for it. 

Ford was there by Stan's side when they were kids causing trouble together. As they entered their teen years and Ford saw his own potential and what he wanted from the future, he didn't see anything for Stan. He always assumed that Stan would figure himself out without really thinking how he'd do it. He got used to carrying Stan, as his father implied, but he didn't care that much right? He would have complained or done something sooner if he had. 

He would have taken Stanley anywhere if he'd just been good and let Ford have what he wanted. Ford knew it sounded selfish and childish, and when he was 17 it was justified _because_ he was still a child. It wasn't a crime to want something different than Stan. It wasn't a crime to want to part from his brother eventually. But for as clever and smart as he was, he never did anything to prepare Stan for it. 

Deep down he knew he wanted to leave New Jersey for a better life. Hell, everyone there did. Stan was charismatic and could befriend normal people and he would have been okay. Maybe met someone, open a garage, get married, have kids. The 'standard' life. In theory, Ford could have insisted Stan be more active in his dating, to have more friends. 

He'd been too afraid of being alone that he kept Stan by his side. The fear of being a freak didn't seem so bad when he had Stan by his side. Stan reassured him that being different wasn't a bad thing, that it was cool and amazing. Even as they got older, he still needed Stan's constant comforting. Stan had been on his side through it all. So had it been fair when he stood by and let their father throw him out? No. Not now, and not then. 

His resentment and 'I don't need Stan anymore' mentality pushed him to survive any social interaction. Not that he cared much for them. He had so much work making up for not getting into his dream school, that it all really just drifted by. But for Stan?  His whole purpose in life had been to be his brother. To care and protect him from the rudeness and cruelty of people who would mock him. Ford did nothing to prepare Stan for their separation and just expected him to be okay after turning his back on him. 

" _Stanford_!" 

"Huh! Oh, uh...yes?" He asked, turning to his friend. 

"I've seen you read thesis papers faster than that. You've been on the same page for the past twenty minutes." 

Ford was quiet for a long moment. "I'm just thinking."

Fiddleford scoffed, "When are you not?" When Ford glared at him, he lifted his hands in an 'I surrender' gesture. "Sorry. What about? Your brother again?"

Ford sighed as he leaned back into his chair. Lifting his glasses he rubbed his eyes tiredly. "The person I remember him to be...the person I remember being mad at...isn't the same person that wrote this. For starters, the penmanship is way neater."

Fiddleford offered Ford a soft smile as he topped off his coffee. "That happens when you haven't seen each other for so long. Has he mentioned when he'll be back?"

"No. But I haven't really gotten far."

"I gotta admit. I thought you'd be through that journal in less than half an hour. Compiling your own notes in a new journal."

"Me too. I just...I've spent so much time not feeling, just thinking about mysteries and the paranormal..."

"Everything you've denied yourself from feeling is hitting you all at once?" 

"Yes. Stanley and I were so close. Best friends. But after he ruined my project I only ever felt one thing towards him."

"For ten years? Ford...for such a smart guy, you can be so stupid sometimes. But go on."

"Thanks." Ford deadpanned. He knew he was emotionally stunted and _he_ sometimes sees that as a plus, he knows it can also be a shortcoming. "To sum it all up, I remember I was angry and that I had a good reason to be. But I can't remember it anymore."

"So now you don't even have the anger just a lingering memory of anger."

"Exactly. I don't even know what to do with all I'm feeling. I don't know _what_ I'm feeling!"

"You miss him," Fiddleford said plainly. When Ford was about to protest, Fiddleford stopped him. "You do. Put up your big boy panties, and admit it. You said so yourself. He was your best friend. For a long time your only friend. It's okay to miss him, you doof. Look. This is complicated. But nothing with you was ever simple, so I'm used to it. I'll help with this too. For now, we can't do much, but start by getting to know him, the present him."

 "How? I don't know where he is. Or have a reliable phone number." 

Fiddleford tapped on the notebook. "No matter what's written, each author has its own flare. They put _their_ thoughts into it. These are your brother's thoughts. Start here." 

 

On the page is a sketch. It's a bit childish, but there's effort. It looks like a seahorse...sort of. Well, almost literally. Like half horse and half mermaid. But on the side is a bar with a number on the side. If the numbers were to be believed, this seahorse was a little under 6ft tall and 3ft wide.

_After a bit of research, I realized that the creature I ran into today after some training was called a Hippocampus._

_I'll be the first to admit, I thought that was part of the brain. Kudos to me, because it is. It's the elongated ridges on the floor of each lateral ventricle of the brain, thought to be the center of emotion, memory, and the autonomic nervous system. But this is something different. I was swimming in rougher waters when I ran into him._

_I don't know if he thought I was drowning and wanted to help me, or thought I was drowning and thought he'd found it's next meal._

_He was pretty and shiny and didn't eat me so I'll do with the heroic version of him. I call him Rainbow. Not manly, I know, but the name fits._

_Hippocampi(plural form) are creatures that resemble a combination of a horse and a fish. If you believe the mythology books, they're under the jurisdiction of the Greek sea god, Poseidon._

_Hippocampi are creatures that from the waist up have the body of a horse and from the waist down, have silvery fish bodies, with glistening scales and rainbow tail-fins. They were used to draw Poseidon's chariot and seafoam was created by their movement._

_Majestic creatures for sure. Very pretty to look at. Not the smartest though. They remind me of dogs. Can be dangerous, but sometimes you just can't see it._

_And with how they act, you kind of forget they can be dangerous._

_Not sure if I'll see Rainbow again, but I had fun with him. Pretty nifty first encounter._

_Signing off,_

_Stanley P._


	3. Sirens

_"Log entry number two: Sirens._

_I gotta admit, I thought they were the same as mermaids. And maybe depending on who you're talking to, they can be._

_But these things weren't anything like Ariel. Geeze! I'm stationed in a town by the sea and ever since my encounter with Rainbow I remain curious about life at sea._

_I know I'm a SEAL but I meant the other dangerous life at sea. I wonder if just anyone can find these things._

_Is it my sense of adventure that lets me see these creatures or can any ole shmuck see them? I couldn't risk anyone's life like that, so I thought I'd have to live that that question for the rest of my life. When I'm not on patrol or in training, I wander around and get cozy with the locals. I listen to them every day, play with the kids on the street, and sit down and eat at their markets._

_I used to be a hella a picky eater, but now I eat whatever. Sometimes it's delicious! Other times it haunts me and my bathroom for days. There are other SEAL's who do the same. There are those who think it's stupid and a waste of time. To each their own, I guess._

_I'm the only one who asks about the mythologies though. Some of the SEAL's think me stupid when I ask on land, but you should see how superstitious those fuckers get when out at sea. Even the most scientific, logical, no-nonsense SEAL respects the mysteries of the sea. Plus I tell them it's for gathering material the next time we're docked and in a tavern and needs a good ghost story to spook us before shipping out._

_Anyway, back to the point before I ramble too much about my team._

_I befriended a local. For the sake of secrecy and safety, we'll call him...uh, Buck. Yeah, Buck._

_Buck and I hit it off pretty great. His dog tackled me trying to get a piece of however the hell you pronounce the thing I was eating. It was like a burrito but not._

_We went halfsies. Me and Zap, not Buck. Buck had to get his own food. But he invited me to tag along as an apology. I always wanted a dog but Pa never allowed it._

_Ford and I used to play with just about any animal we found, but the closest thing we ever got to a pet was the raccoon that lived in the alley. We named him El Diablo._

_Ford and I were convinced that thing was related to the Jersey Devil._

_Anyway, back to Buck and me. So he takes me to the great local places and we chow down. I told him the story about El Diablo in a butchered attempt to speak the native language. Then the fucker laughs at me and speaks in English! He said he learned English young from Missionaries that passed by and worked at the church his family goes to. I asked him about local legends, see if there's anything worth exploring and what do you know, he hits me with this. Sirens. I do a bit of research but the books here aren't in English so don't quote me on this stuff. Sirens are best known for singing one hell of a tune that drew sailors to their deaths._

_They were formerly handmaidens and best friends of the goddess Persephone. When she was secretly abducted by Hades on the island of Capri, Demeter gave them the bodies of birds and sent them to assist in the search. After finding no sign of Persephone, they instead settled on the flowery island of Anthemoessa._

_It was here that they would sing their enchanting song that would lure sailors to their death, as no one could resist their song and the people would drown trying to reach them. However, the Argonauts managed to pass by unharmed thanks to Orpheus, who used his song and poetry to shield his shipmates from the song of the Sirens. Odysseus also managed to pass by ordering his crew to tie him to the mast, disarm him, and plug their ears, so that they would know when they had passed safely by seeing Odysseus' reaction._

_Depending on the myth, their numbers and names tend to change. In the Odyssey, Homer says there were_ two _but gives them no names. Other myths say there are anywhere from two to five Sirens. The Sirens have been given names such as Peisinoe, Aglaope,_ and _Thelxiepeia or other variations of.'_

 

 

"What's with the face?" 

"What face?" Ford asked as he looked up from the notebook. 

Fiddleford was eating half of a sandwich, which made Ford look to his side to see the other half. He hadn't noticed when it got there. Or the cup of tea next to it. He assumed it'd been hot when it arrived. Now it was cold. 

"You look like yer' bout to have an aneurysm." 

"I do not." 

"Do too. That's your aneurysm face. Watcha readin' bout?" Fiddleford asked before taking a big bite from his sandwich. 

"Sirens. Stanley's writing about them."

"Oh? Golly...he actually survived their song?" 

"I stopped reading but there are more entries after this so I assume so. And at the moment he's only describing chatting up the locals, becoming friendly with them, and learning their lore." Ford explained. 

"That's smart. Kind of exciting too." Fiddleford commented with slight excitement. 

"Yeah..." Ford didn't share the excitement. 

"So...why with the face?" 

Ford was quiet for a long moment before he finally answered. "He seems...happy." 

"That's good, right?" 

"It is. Yeah, I just...I thought we had to grow up. Give up all the childish dreams and foolish hopes if we wanted to succeed. Stanley didn't. And he found a loophole. One that worked." 

"But yer happy too right? Or you were. Right now you're in a slump but it's not like it's forever. You had yer own dreams and you followed them. Just cos they're different from yer brother's don't mean you ain't successful." 

Ford sighed. Fiddleford that a point. "If Stan had been here, I probably wouldn't have needed to go looking for Bill. Or he'd at least be able to see through his sham. I was taken in like a sucker because of my pride. The same pride that kept me from contacting my brother in over a decade. Now here I am living in fear and paranoia that I might lead to the world's end while dealing with my new-found guilt and my brother managed to hold on to his own dreams without carrying the burden of my pride..."

"Well...I don't have much to offer in comfort. But I am proud of you Ford. Your emotional constipation is moving along!" 

"Thanks..." Ford deadpanned. 

"Read the rest of his entry. I'll go clean this up." Fiddleford said, meaning their lunch.

Ford nodded and picked up where he left off.  

 

 "' _The Sirens sing the truth about what you desire. They tell you things about yourself you didn't even realize. That's what's so enchanting. If you survive, you are said to become wiser.' That's what Buck says anyway. I did my best to seem like just another run of the mill nerd, but the next morning when I asked myself on to a fisherman's boat, guess who joins me on my 'quest'?_

_Apparently, I was more eager to hear all the tales he knew to just be a 'run of the mill nerd'. He wasn't there to stop me either or call me foolish._

_No, he wanted to come along. He craved adventure and wanted to see the tales he grew up on. I tried to talk him out of it, but not very convincingly. I told him I was very well trained and had a natural charisma that monsters, or people, didn't like. I'd be fine on my own. Buck reminded me that the best adventures come from the best teams. I couldn't argue with him there. And like I said, I didn't want to do this alone. I'd become very used to have people around me, as weird as it was. The whole loner thing wasn't all that it's cracked up to be. Plus as the saying goes, 'The lone wolf dies, but the pack survives.'_

_God knows I wouldn't have survived without my family. Granted, a pack of wolves sounds only a little bit cooler than a heard of SEALs._

 

Ford had to stop again. Why was reading this so hard? What were these emotions that rose inside of him? Why were they even there? He knew he'd been a bad brother. He knew he was prideful and that he'd been childish! So why, then, did he still feel like this? 

Why did it hurt to read that Stan had a family outside of the Pines clan? 

When did he become the lone wolf? And why did it bother him so much? 

_'The whole loner thing wasn't all that it's cracked up to be.'_

"The lone wolf dies, but the pack survives..." Ford muttered. He thought he'd been an Alpha all this time. Brave and strong enough to tackle any weirdness that came at him. But he wasn't. He was a gullible, naive, feral omega that was lured towards power. Without a pack to help him survive. But before he delved too far into that, he kept reading. 

 

_"We'd left on calm waters and though the sky promised some choppy waves, as we got closer to this island, the waters just got worse. The crew hunkered down below deck and invited us to come along. We didn't. Buck warned me that the closer we got the more likely the chances we'd heard the siren's song. He had earplugs in his ears but before he could offer me a pair...I heard it. Through the wind and storm, I heard a melody. I can't for the life of me describe it but it had me. A pull too strong surged through me and I couldn't fight it. I didn't want to. Without thinking, I ran toward the water. Buck tried to pull me back, but I was taller and stronger. Not to mention the stormed that picked up and the tall waves that splashed on board didn't leave too much friction for Buck to use._

_So I jumped._

_I didn't care what was in the water, I probably wouldn't have cared if I knew how to swim, but good thing I did. Though to be honest it didn't matter. The waters were way too choppy and we were too far from shore. The crew was bunkered down and even if Buck managed to explain the situation, I doubt they'd help. I wasn't from around there, and I came willingly knowing the risk. Many souls had been lost at sea, and they'd accept pretty easily that I'd just be another one._

_And me? Well, I kept swimming towards that island. Around me, everything was dark and gloomy, depressing and sad. But in my mind, it was sunny and warm. I could easily see the beach within reach. I was almost there...almost home! The Stan O' War was complete and ready to ship off to any corner of the world! And Ford wa-_

 

Ford slammed the notebook shut. His shoulders shook and he fought back against the tears but still, a few escaped. He was sure he felt Fiddleford's presence but the other didn't bother him this time. And he was thankful.

Taking a few moments to meditate, he managed to start reading again. There wasn't much left for this entry anyway. He just skipped the rest of what Stan's siren song entailed. 

 

' _A wave crashed over me and dragged me under a few feet. The rush of water in my ear stopped the song an I had clarity again. I could hold my breath for a long time thanks to my training, but not forever. Going up for air was hard. The waters were stronger than me, and even if I managed to go topside, the song had me under its spell again. Even if I fought, the distance was too great from shore and by now also the boat. In the moments of clarity under water, I assumed this was it and I was going to die._

_I didn't and I can't really tell you why not. I lost consciousness after another wave dragged me under. I struggled for as long as I could. I thought I felt movement, but it could have been a passing current. As I said, I can't really tell you what happened in these moments._

_When I woke up, it was on a beach._

_But that's another tale for another entry._

_Signing off,_

_Stanley P.'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To Beth: Originally when I tagged Jealous Ford it was with my intentions of this chapter. Him reading about Stan living out what used to be THEIR dream with someone else. But as the previous chapters were written it just fit in well in that concept too. That somehow despite his brilliant mind, he couldn't make his previous dream a reality but Stan the 'dumb' brother could. And it wasn't Stanley holding him back but vice versa and that whole never-ending debate of brain vs. brawn.


	4. Ogygia and Calypso

_"Journal Entry Three: An Island and a Nymph_

_Picking up where we left off, I woke up on the beach after assuming I was going to die. Considering what I saw with the Siren's song, I wasn't completely sure I wasn't actually dead. But my body hurt too much for it to be Heaven. And it was too nice and missing Pa for it to be Hell. Purgatory was also an option and coming up the winner._

_The pain wasn't awful. I had all my limbs and could walk. I was horribly sunburn, was scratched and bruised, but not roadkill. So I got up and did some exploring._

_I was on an island. Looking towards the sea there wasn't much else but water as far as the eye could see. The sun was shining, the waters were calm, no cloud in the sky. It felt like it was the perfect day. So naturally, it just felt off._

_I've had good days, I've had exciting days, but never have I had a perfect day. Especially not at sea. Moments, sure but this seemed to be the whole day. The island itself didn't seem too big. It had plant life and vegetation. Enough that I didn't immediately worry about food or water. I went through all of my training to not panic at the thought of being stranded._

_Instead of panicking I went into survival mode. I went to look for shelter, water, and food. Once I at least had two out of the three I began to explore and take notice of the island. I can't really explain why it was bugging me so much being there, but it did. That sense of impending doom was just constantly on me. The hairs on my arms and the back of my neck were standing on end and everything in me was telling me to grab something to use as a weapon._

 

"You have that face again." 

"It really isn't my intention. This isn't like reading a storybook or listening to a myth about someone from long ago. This is my brother! My twin who was in peril and I'm only just now learning about it." Ford defended himself. 

"Fair enough. But you're never going to get through the whole journal if you keep staring off into space like that." Fiddleford told him. 

Ford knew he had a point but for once Ford didn't want to speed through. Sure it built up the suspense and he couldn't be certain that at this very moment Stanley was safe in some Navy facility, but he didn't want to read through too soon. Before he could find the courage to go back, he heard the rumblings from below. He shared a concerned look with Fiddleford. 

The last couple of days the portal has been acting up. Ford couldn't be one hundred percent sure Bill was still putting things in motion from either realm. He's stopped working on it, but it had been mostly complete. Neither he nor Fiddleford has touched it as they came up with a plan of how to take it down. They needed to be very careful with the rifts that could remain behind. The machine has begun to randomly fritz on. Never for long but enough to leave both scientists on edge. 

After they went to make sure everything was secure...for a moment anyway, Ford tried to read more of Stan's journal. For some reason, the activity in the basement became more frequent so he really skimmed over. Considering the contents, he wasn't missing much. Sure he felt a weird jealousy of someone stealing his brother away since even when it came to dating, Stan always ended up choosing their familiar bond over a romantic possibility. 

 

_"After a whole day think I was alone, I literally walked into a trap and learned I wasn't alone."_

 

"Ford these instances are happening far more frequently." Fiddleford shared his concerns. 

"I know." Ford didn't know what else to say because he didn't have any other solutions. 

"Should we try to place in more security measures?" Fiddleford asked.

"Without the journals all being in one place, Bill can't get what he needs. Stan's taken number One across the seas and I've hidden number Three very well. But if there's anything else we can find, I wouldn't be opposed."

"I'll start looking in your notes over here," Fiddleford said. 

Ford grabbed a few of his notes but kept Stan's journal open to keep skimming. 

 

_"Apparently I crashed into her island. She lives here alone as a punishment or something. She's hella crafty. It's insanely impressive all she can do. She fixed up my clothes! Also with some weird magic of hers or her weiving made them fireproof and like...so they'd instantly dry and be practically indestructible? Imagine the money I'll save! She's a real doll! And this place ain't half bad. And it looked like I'm kinda stuck..._

_No boats passed near or far for weeks. After a month I lost track._

_Time is weird in these places so it might have been longer despite the fact-checking I did when I got back._

 

"I think I found something...if we can get our hands on some unicorn hair, we might be able to secure my house in full," Ford said as he showed Fiddleford the notes on unicorns he had. 

Fiddleford frowned, "Finding a unicorn might not be as easy as some of the other stuff, Stanford. I helped you catalog a lot of the creatures in Gravity Falls but we ain't ever seen hide or tail of any unicorn." 

"They're elusive, that's for sure. But unless you have any other ideas...it's our only lead."

"I'll pack us some lunch," Fiddleford said with a defeated sigh. 

Ford nodded to him and began to pack for a hike. He had go-backs ready so it didn't take long. While he waited for Fiddleford he finished reading the entry.

 

_"The guys would bust my chops if they ever heard I actually sorta like those stupid rom-coms._

_But what can I say? I dig romance. No matter that it never dug me back._

_But this time...well it wasn't like any time before._

_I've met dames, before and after becoming a SEAL._

_Before becoming a SEAL I was young so it didn't matter much that they lost interest. If they couldn't be nice to Ford than, heh, they weren't worth it._

_I've met girls across the world too. Some that were damn interesting but after a night, there wasn't much reason to come back._

_Calypso was different though._

_She could kick my ass and look magnificent doing it. I didn't have to worry about being too much of a brute or a wimp. With her...I had balance._

_I'd accepted I've live the rest of my days there with her, and in the end...that wasn't a bad deal. I told her as such._

_I thought she'd be happy._

_She wanted to be. But she told me she was also cursed._

_It would have been stupid if I told her I didn't believe in curses, but I tried to spin it in a romantic way anyway. But then she told me exactly how she was cursed. Every 'hero' that came wouldn't stay. This was the gods' way of punishing her for something her dad did. Which is totally bogus!_

_Sadly I could imagine having to carry the burden of Pa's past actions easily enough, and it wasn't fair. I got it. I understood. And I wanted to try and fight it. To be the one who broke the curse. To defy the gods and be with her!_

_And just as I did...Rainbow popped his head above the water._

_He was the first creature I've seen bigger than a bug. And the way he was looking at me...I didn't speak Magic Horse but I somehow understood...he was here for me._

_Calypso smiled sadly at me and I felt gut-wrenching guilt. Before, the chances of getting off the island seem impossible without a boat or a plane._

_I didn't know far away I was from other shores and it didn't seem likely that Rainbow could get me anywhere safely._

_She told me our time was up and I had to go home._

_I asked her to come with me._

_She kissed me and told me it was time to conquer the demons of the past. I could stay here...or I could brave the sea and go back home._

_Go home and apologize to Ford._

_It's so weird... **years** and so much experience later, making me choose between something and my brother...I still choose him. _

_Heh, guess I still love that nerd._

 

"Ford?" Fiddleford's voice was quiet. 

Ford looked up but his vision was blurry. Wiping his eyes he realized with embarrassment that he was crying. He sniffed as he wiped the remaining of his tears away and closed the notebook. "Did you pack enough snacks? We might need some to lure away or appease something we come across."

To his credit, Fiddleford didn't comment on his tears. Ford saw him smile sympathetically but he didn't want to get into another 'emotions are normal' talk with Fiddleford.

"I did. We're completely covered on the snack department." Fiddleford said. 

They grabbed their gear after triple checking they had everything and deem themselves ready to head off. Ford led the way and opened the door and then froze. On the other side of the door stood Stanley, fist raised to mid-knock. 

"Ford? Wha-...oh."

"Stanley?"

"Hey Sixer...uh, this a bad time?" 


	5. Coming home?

Stan stood there awkwardly since Ford seemed to freeze after realizing who was in his doorstep. He'd imagine their reunion plenty of times but it changed many times over the years. In the beginning, when it was still fresh and the pain was almost too much to bear, he imagined Ford groveling for his forgiveness. But that image changed as he got older and experienced some harsh truths. During his deployment and he saw firsthand at what real unfairness was, he could only pray that he would get to see his brother at all period before he went into the ground. 

On the way over he really couldn't decide what he wanted. Part of him still expected a punch in the face for ruining that project all those years ago. But maybe they'd settle for a good hearty handshake.

Someone behind his brother elbowed him and that snapped Ford out of whatever daze he was in. That seemed to do the trick and made Ford realize that Stan actually _was_ there. 

So he hugged the hell out of him. 

Stan froze. Out of all the reactions he expected from Ford, he expected the punch sooner than the hug. After the shock wore off, he hugged Ford back too, hiding his face in his brother's neck because he didn't want to be seen on the verge of tears. 

As for Ford...this had been unexpected. He had no intention of seeing his brother today or soon. But unlike any other time in the past, his desire to do so was vast. The danger posed by Bill and his own creation weighed down on him and if anything were to go wrong, he'd never be able to rest in this life or the next without having made amends. So much time wasted on petty jealousy and childish anger...

"I'm so sorry, Lee."

"Hey...hey...it's okay. I'm sorry too."

They hugged awhile longer before Fiddlford cleared his throat. The brothers separated and looked emotionally wrecked but Fiddleford's never seen Ford a calm as he did now. 

Ford cleared his own throat and wiped his eyes. "Right, uh...Lee this is my colleague Fiddleford McGucket. Fiddleford, this is my brother Stanley." 

Stan extended his hand and when Fiddleford shook it, he knew that Stan really _was_ quite the military man. That handshake was very firm.

"Nice to meet ya," Stan said. 

"Pleasure's all mine."

"Stan, what on earth are you doing here?" Ford asked. Their worry of the machine activating on its own was still in his mind, but suddenly with Stan here, he didn't feel as worried. 

"Didn't you get my notebook?" Stan asked. 

"I did." Ford nodded, then shyly admitted. "I haven't finished it yet."

"Ah. Well, I tried my best but I guess it probably wasn't as interesting as your projects you must be working on." Stanley said a bit self consciously. 

"No! No, they're quite fascinating and I actually have some follow up questions from some of your tales." Ford said quickly. He had a new image of Stanley. A stronger, more cunning brother than the one who acted as his sole friend and protector as children. He didn't want to make his brother feel stupid like he might have before. "I just...we've been a bit busy with an experiment and I just haven't finished it. Why?"

"Oh well, at the end I mentioned I was coming back to the country after the last entry. I sent the notebook before me, not sure who'd get here first."

"You coulda called," Fiddleford mentioned. 

"I could but uh...I uh...lost my nerve." There was an awkward silence before Stan gestured to both of them, "You two going somewhere?" 

"Hm? Oh! Right...uh...we were going to get some...unicorn hair..."

"Unicorn...hair?" Stan asked with a raised eyebrow before he nodded. "Right. Okay. Want me to come along?" He motioned to his duffle before he added, "I'm still packed."

"It's alright! Uh, you've had a long journey. We'll only be gone a few hours. Why don't you come in and make yourself a home. We'll be back before you know it!" 

"You sure? I could look for lodging somewhere in town. I...I don't even know how long I'm staying." Stan said, sounding a bit unsure. And he wasn't. It was really up to Ford to say how long he wanted Stan to stay.

"No! Here! Stay...you're staying here. We're...we're _family_ , you knucklehead. You're staying right here." Seeing Stan again, all of the dangers he knew his brother had been in, both with the supernatural and with the Navy, made him worry greatly. He needed to know his brother was safe and sound. 

Stan smiled as he adjusted his duffle over his shoulders. "Alright. Uh, then I guess you guys better head out? There are only so many hours left of sunlight." 

"Right! Uh...we'll be back. There's not much in the fridge but the keys to my car are on the counter. Feel free to use it."

"Don't you need your car?" 

"Not where we're going. Come on Fiddleford, Stan's right." 

"Right behind ya Ford. Later Stanley. Good finally meeting ya!" Fiddleford waved as he and Ford headed to the woods. 

It was a weird feeling, and Stan would need a few moments to process all that just happened. But he wouldn't have those moments. Not long after Ford and Fiddleford disappeared from view, Stan heard some weird noises coming from the basement. As he went to explore what could be causing them, he didn't see the doorknob turn to let in a stranger possessed by Bill. 

* * *

 

 

Ford and Fiddleford didn't make it deep enough to find any unicorns. A lot of weird, anti-gravity anomalies began to happen that only happened when the portal was being activated. Fearing for his brother's safety, the pair ran back t the house. 

When they arrived, Ford who was already imagining the worse, noticed how the door was opened. It wasn't something old Stanley would do, much less Navy SEAL Stanley. They barged through the door and rushed towards the elevator that would take them to the basement. 

"STANLEY!" Ford cried out just as he saw a stranger with wild eyes kick Stanley against the side of the controls. One of the sigils burned into Stan's back causing him to scream in pain.

"Stanley! Get away from my brother!" Ford yelled as he grabbed the closest blunt object he could and attacked the Bill possessed being. 

" ** _YOU CAN'T STOP THIS FORDSIE!"_** Bill's voice came out, as unsettling as ever, but even more so out of a human mouth. 

Despite knowing he'll have little effect, Ford tried to fight off Bill. For his brother and his friend. That was more dangerous than just taking on a demon from another dimension with limited power in that form. The portal was sparking up and activating since Ford hadn't done too much to shut it down permanently. The stuff he did do could easily be undone by someone as crafty as Bill. 

In stepping too close, Ford got caught in the gravitational pull of the portal's power. 

Fiddleford and Stan were both trying to fight Bill at this point, not noticing Ford in danger. As Ford watched Fiddleford fly back and hit his head hard enough to pass out, and Stanley continue to fight despite being seriously injured from fighting who knows how long, Ford realized how much his pride was costing him. He should have taken the portal down the moment he realized Bill's true intentions. His work be damned, he couldn't let Bill destroy the world his family lives in. 

"FORD!" Stanley cried out as he noticed the situation. He hadn't wanted to use violence to an extreme, but Ford was in danger. Even though he knew it might be an innocent person who was just at the wrong place at the wrong time, like with Calypso he knew that between something else and his brother...he'll always choose Ford. Stanley jumped towards his duffel and pulled out a gun, shooting the poor vessel between the eyes.

He didn't stop to think or feel sorry for the life he just took and ran towards Ford to help. Stanley easily got caught in the gravitational pull, but he used the momentum he gained to kick Ford out of it. Back in gravity's grasp, Ford fell to the ground. While he came to his epiphany, Stan had, without thinking, settled into his resolve. 

Every time he had to make a choice...he'd _always_ choose Ford. Even if the other option was his life. 

"STANLEY!" Ford cried as he realized too slowly what was happening. The machine was reaching a critical point. There wasn't any rope at hand to throw to Stan and with just the two of them, they couldn't effectively get to safety. Ford scrambled to shut the machine off manually when the sparks and whirling just got louder and louder. Tears of near defeat and misery ran down Ford's face. He looked over to his brother. His brother who was bruised, branded, and here because of him. "I'm so sorry. I can fix this! Just hang on!"

"It's okay Ford...high si-?"

The portal flashed a blinding light as Stanley was sucked in. A powerful energy blast erupted which crashed and broke the machinery around. When the blast subsided, the portal itself also broke under the pressure. 

And Stanley?

Stanley was gone. 

_To be continued..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I really going to end it here? With Stan through the portal leaving an emotional unstable Ford behind with a destroyed portal, no idea how to get his hands back on the first journal, an unconscious Fiddleford, AND a dead body? 
> 
> Yup. 
> 
> Special thanks to Beth. Even though for once I had an idea of what the hell I was doing, your loyal commenting helped me to be encouraged to write more. So gracias to you! Hope to see you in the next installment. Whenever that is.


End file.
